*CUSSOM

 YT

 

The violence and evil and intolerance of the MAGA Republicans will be destroyed.  We will exterminate everything the haters love.  They have no idea what's coming, yeah, see?  Never again, Maga.  

A new glorious new age is here at hand.  Let us rise together, waft majestically across this broad green, green and windpower land, from Alaska to Myrtle Beach!  Let us stride heroically forward onward into the glorious sunshine of the radiant future and the solar powered sun!  

Let's ... Create the United States Super Once More! CUSSOM!  We can rebuild it back better! We have the green technology! We can make it better than it was! Better, stronger, faster, um, newer!  Bigger!  Diversitier!  Possibly!  Come, yes, aha, be, with me, besides and ... CUSSOM! CUSSOM! CUSSOM!...  

-- JRB, Jr, on our 246 year as a nation on Earth 

He thinks he's funny.  That's been my problem too.   I think an exaggerated disgustingly vain persona is funny.  But I'm too old for it to work, now.  Like Jerry Lewis being his monkey, at age 60, or 70 or 80 or 90.  It just didn't work. Young and skinny worked.  I'm not sure why my know-it-all vanity-guy doesn't work.  It doesn't feel right -- I still use it, accidentally, an unthoughtful laziness or a very old habit.  But I immediately notice and regret it.  A minor regret.

Biden thinks he's funny.  The sotto voce whisper -- "I'm the President" -- "I'm the Commander in Chief".  Wow.  Just wow.  You know, absolutely know that he thinks he's funny.  That's why he so frequently informs us that he is NOT joking.  It usually seems to mean that he IS lying.  So, useful. 

There's a lot of silliness, pettiness, carping and picking at the other political side.  That's fine, people do it, and hopefully it's amusing for a bit. But it's just trivia, not really trying to convince or establish a point.  

President Ford was clumsy and said the Soviets did not dominate Eastern Europe.  President Carter was attacked by a rabbit and had been a peanut farmer.  Bush I was a wimp. Dukakis looked funny in a helmet in a tank.  clinton, well, all that was true.  Gore invented the internet.  Bush II looked like a chimp.  Kerry wore a bunny suit and said Jangus Khan.  Obama ... but we don't dare say anything about him.  Trump was a huckster, which was true, but not consequential.  

And now Biden.  Being old is fine.  But let this be a warning. A lifetime in high political office should have an expiration date -- after which, no presidency for you.  Forty-eight years, less four, is more than enough.  Make it a general rule, proven by Biden.  I expect to grow much older than Biden, and far healthier and more cogent.  So I may decide to be the exception, and if so I'll set the bar for myself at, say, 95.

For Biden, walking old and off in the wrong direction is just bad optics, nothing real.  Verbal gaffs and misreads are regrettable, but fair-mindedness looks for the substance and intended meaning of what people say.  It's just that there's something so unserious, so small about him.  So obvious, so insecure.  Partisan.  Petty.  

This isn't ad hominem.  It is about him, but politics is not my point.  The man himself.  The guy, the dude.  He doesn't have the discipline to stay on message, let alone on script.  He's so bad at the job -- yes, policies, but politics.  Repeating "MAGA Republicans" -- Putin's gas hike ... the name-calling and rejection of responsibility.  Really?  Putin decides what American prices will be?  Even if it's true, the president should not say it.  And the great number of Trump supporters are bad?  The hackness of it.  Joe Biden, president only of the ultra CUSSOM Democrats who agree with him. 

Honestly.  MAGA vs CUSSOM!  It's the clash of kaiju monster movies and the Lovecraft mythos: Mothra vs Chthulhu.  Or, make that Maguma.  Deep in the Stygian bowels of some oppressive magma chamber, the loathsome ichorous spawn of nameless chaos bestirs itself from a scathing torpor of roiling millennia and, hideously awokened, unutterably outraged, unreasonably triggered ... CUSSOM rises!!!  Meanwhile, freed from the frigid bonds of unnamable boreal ice in the melting frost-bound farthest climate-changing climes of the north, slavering noisomely in its bloated greed and squamous intolerance ... MAGUMA creeps forth!!!  And so on.  Adjectival doom awaits us to the utmost adverb.

I do play this game -- cf my frequent callbacks to pronouns -- but I'm not a serious person. If I had great responsibility, I would train myself to never, never do my big ego guy.  It doesn't work at my age, and it wouldn't work in a position of authority.  

Biden is using social tricks that he learned in the sixties.  They will have been how 50 years ago he got elected to the Senate.  Dramatic or humorous stories about how interesting and admirable he is.  Glad-handing and backslapping.  Somehow, they got him this far.  But now, completely inappropriate.  

Biden, find some other fake way to be.  You are the Commander in Chief.  Respect that.  A rookie officer has to learn command presence.  How much more, you.  You are President of the United States.  Have some gravitas.

J

Notice: CUSSOM hats are now available in aquamarine, gaslight, and stylish blue yonder!

Only $20.24 (plus 19.73 tax plus 49.99 shipping and handling, plus $246.42 cussoms duty -- other fees may apply)  at YeOldeWhiteHouseGiftShoppe. gov and the DisneyStoreOnline.  One size fits all.  Supply unlimited.  (Also available, Biden Balloons!  Guaranteed large enough to meet all your transcontinental needs.  Forgivable FHA loans available.)  Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!!!