Back of the Bus

They came here to be illegal. It’s the least we can do for them. Not the most, of course. There are two schools of thought, as to that. One school would have these self-selectors propelled not just to the head of the entrance line … no, strike that – what line? They’ve already propelled themselves through the entrance door itself. But beyond this, the welcome-mat pols want the invaders to take a privileged place, now that the hinges are so clearly off the door. The rules, you see, don’t apply to them. They’d pay some token fee – I believe they’re calling it a “fine” – that is certainly less than any filing fees and attorney costs that a ­real immigrant would be, and is, subject to.

The second school of thought would have the invaders repulsed – as invaders must be, for a culture to survive. Senator McCain has denigrated this position by supposing that by not legitimizing the bastard-immigration policy that is currently at play here, we would be sending the scofflaws “to the back of the bus.”

No, Senator McCain. For shame. We do not want them in the back of the bus. First, at the rate things are going the image is of a jet, not a bus. And given that metaphor, they are already taking over the cockpit. Hmm. What other illegal aliens does this remind me of? One, small, such group a few years ago hated our culture and attacked our infrastructure. Today, another such very large group exploits our infrastructure and would replace our culture.

No, the “back of the bus” cliché is so wrong, in so many ways, that it’s just stupid. We have a group in this country that has a vested interest in jealously guarding the meaning of such phrases as “back of the bus.” My respect for this group continues to grow, when I remember with what honor and dignity a certain generation conducted itself in winning the rights that should have been a birthright. To have that valiant struggle compared to the shoddy, ignoble and self-promoting spectacle of greed and anarchy of the invaders, is sickening. But greed has no shame.

We don’t want them in the back of the bus. We want them off of the bus – or having free rein, full control of the bus, heading south. There, they can get in line, like honest people. It has to do with the most obvious traits of human nature. Why do we have lines? So that the first may be the first served. Why do we have walls? Because there are always those who do not respect the rights of others, and would take for themselves what is not theirs.

Well, I said “walls” – I was speaking figuratively, since we don’t have walls. Walls? What’s a wall? Fences? Doors? What do these words mean? Now, everyone does understand what a welcome mat is. That’s the thing you wipe your dirty boots all over – maybe stomp out the mud, maybe scrape off some dog droppings. In other words, it’s just like the law – something to trample under your feet.

The saying goes, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. We’ve got a lot, broken here. But we don’t fix it by renaming the problem. Okay, you can be legal. And instantly the pressure on the schools and hospitals and prisons disappears? - while tens of millions of new immigrants enter, this time legally, in numbers higher by orders of magnitude? The reasoning seems to be, if it is broke, destroy it. I have a word for this sort of reasoning. I’ll give you a hint. It starts with f, and ends with uck. Oh, firetruck, you suppose? Um ... yeah ... that's what I meant. "Firetruck." Because the place is burning down, and we need some heroes to rescue us. Yeah. Firetruck.

J