Humoresque

First Man: License, please.

Second Man: You stopped me because I am Moslem. This is racial profiling.

First Man: License please.

Second Man: You are a racist and an infidel dog.

First Man: Sir, control your emotions. I stopped you because I just saw you shoot six Jews, killing one of them. You need a license for that.

Second Man: I am terrorist. I do not need a license.

First Man: In this country you do, sir. If you wish to get full credit for your act, you must be accredited and licensed by the FBI.

Second Man: I have no license. I kill them because they are Jews.

First Man: And you have no license?

Second Man: No.

First Man: Well, that’s not terrorism, then. To be recognized as terrorism, all such acts must be authorized, at least retroactively, by some presiding legal authority.

Second Man: This is very frustrating me. It is true I want them all dead, but I also want credit as a terrorist. This is my ticket to paradise and...

First Man: Yes, sir, and your virgins. I know the routine. Well I will be citing you, sir, but not for terrorism. You are clearly bi-polar, and your crime is in no way associated with Islam or ethnicity, either yours or the Jews’. Otherwise you would be licensed.

Second Man: No! It is too! Allah has commanded me to kill the infidel!

First Man: I’m sorry sir. It’s not terrorism. Especially because you are Moslem. The matter is settled. This is a criminal matter. You have the right to an attorney...

Second Man: Yes, my attorney will get me retroactively authorized!

First Man: I’m sorry sir, but that will be impossible.

Second Man: But you just said...

First Man: Please sir. You must realize by now that you cannot believe what I say.

Second Man: Just who are you?

First Man: That’s a good question. A very good question. Who am I, indeed.

Fin

J