Monday, October 19, 2009


Isn't acknowledged a weird looking word? Ack now led ged. It's like a random assemblage of syllables. Like someone who doesn't speak English is trying to speak English.

I had some time free up Friday evening. Hardly knew what to do with myself. And some time just opened up now. Too late to go back to sleep. Too early for a booty call. I knew a guy once who said, off-handedly, that he'd just like to invent something and live off the money so he could train bjj all day long. That same guy recently had a sort of a business opportunity to teach and train bjj all day long, and he turned it down. Isn't that odd? It would have entailed other responsibilities, regarding which he was not motivated. But even inventing something must require compromises.

I'm such a strange person. Are you strange too? I wonder what it's like not to be strange. I think it's healthy to be normal. I don't think being strange is a good thing. It's like being offered a good thing, and turning it down. That's strange. Why are we like that. It's a sort of self-loathing. Not laziness. Fear of being complete. Fear of being happy. Like Yggdrasil. Hmm. The spell-checker knows that word, Yggdrasil. How strange. It's the tree of the world, in and under which all creatures live, and upon which all creatures feed, off the leaves and fruits and bark. At its root, a monstrous worm gnaws unceasingly. That's how I think it is. I think we will always be incomplete. I'm strange because I think that's normal.

All my loyalty points outward. I don't seem to feel any sense of duty to myself. That's not a good way to be.

Someone should open up a chain of restaurants that are holiday themed. Christmas all year round, and Halloween. Those are the powerful ones. Playrooms for kids, full of toys or scary things to play on. Easter, Fourth of July, Thanksgiving -- they seem less evocative. There's a fortune to be made in that idea. But who could be bothered. (I hereby assert and proclaim all rights commercial and otherwise to all original ideas explicit and implied contained within this paragraph.)


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