I just read that Obama has, for his possible reelection, so far attended 160 fundraisers. Well, at least he's not trying to govern, while speechifying. Small blessings. And consider if you dare all this inexplicable and coincidentally election-year leaking about how amazing Obama is. Who needs WikiLeaks when we have ... WhitehouseLeaks? -- WhiteyLeaks. Might as well have gonorrhea, for all the slime dripping out of that hole.
Take for example Obama's heroic personal accomplishment, when in person he heroically slew the monster Osama bin Laden, sliding down the rope out of his lone helicopter ... no, it was a paraglider, kicking in doors with his size 13s, backflipping into the, uh, pleasure chamber of the Beast 911 and piercing him through the throat, no, eyeball with a crossbow bolt. And he had a big knife between his teeth, which, spinning agilely, he flicked into the, uh, throat of the most senior Mrs bin Ladin who was stealthily approaching the Prez's back intent on garroting him. Oh man, it was bitchin'. And we know all about it cuz of those fortunate White House leaks. Thank heaven.
Not to mention, hardly, the double-agent in Yemen. Who can be bothered to remember. Some dude infiltrated a terror cell? I really don't suppose it's so hard to do that. Just kill some babies or something, right? -- some jew babies? Small price to pay. Double agents like that, and jew babies, we can afford to sacrifice, if it gets us even more of this fabulous hope and change.
Not to mention the drone war against al-Qaeda bigwig big turban big beards. Seems Obama plays solitaire with himself, using terrorist playing cards, or tarot-ist, get it? -- sort of a Go Fish thing, the Hand of Fate, one a week, just to send a message, that Obama is a Playah but he ain't playin. Be afraid, be very afraid. Terror to the Terrorists. The Great Provider has a kill list of those who have been naughty and naughtier. Smells like justice to me. I wonder if they're actual cards, of if it's a video thing. In any case, sure am glad it's been made public. The public has a right to know. All the news that's fit to leak.
And did you hear the one about the Stuxnet cyberworm attack on Iran's imminent islam bomb (distinct in degree if not intent from your typical islam bomb, suicide or IED)? Of course you have. It's all over the web. It's gone viral. Man, is that Obama amazingly fierce against them islamists. "A vote for Obama is a vote for strong government." I'm gonna submit that to the Huffington Post as a campaign slogan.
Peggy Noonan offers us a delectible tidbit, quoting David Sanger's book, Confront and Conceal: Obama's Secret Wars and Surprising Use of American Power:
During the search for Osama bin Laden, American intelligence experts had a brilliant idea. Bin Laden liked to make videotapes to rouse his troops and threaten the West. Why not flood part of Pakistan with new digital cameras, each with a 'unique signature' that would allow its signals to be tracked? The signal could function as a beacon for a drone. Agents got the new cameras into the distribution chain of Peshawar shops. The plan didn't catch Osama, because he wasn't in that area. But 'traceable digital cameras are still relied on by the CIA . . . and remain highly classified."Well, they were," adds Noonan.
She continues, "During the Arab Spring, King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia was insistent that Mr. Obama needed to stick with Egypt's Hosni Mubarak, even, Mr. Sanger reports, 'if he started shooting protestors in the streets.'
"King Abdullah must be glad he called."
That's not the sort of thing that best practice allows to become public. Sort of undermines any basis for, um, trust.
Some might suppose leaks are okay because the enemy cannot read. But there is that one book they love so much, and it is not reasonable to suppose they are illiterate in all but matters of theology. Does Islamabad have no cybercafes? Some whispers do not get distorted in the transmission. 'Psst, Obama uses cards to personally decide who to kill with drones!' 'What's that you say? Osama called Hooters on speed dial despite his kids being home?'
I cannot resist, a final time, Ms Noonan's, summary: "There's something in the leaks that is a hallmark of the Obama White House. They always misunderstand the country they seek to spin, and they always think less of it than it deserves. Why do the president's appointees think the picture of him with a kill list in his hand makes him look good? He sits and personally decides who to kill? Americans don't think of their presidents like that. And they don't want to."
Oh well. There's nothing to be done, except continue to be Americans, whatever that is Evolving into. Maybe protest having to contribute to a retirement fund? Maybe call in sick so I can scrapbook all day? Maybe borrow a stack of bills to buy a bunch of crap to stimulate the economy? Maybe write a letter?
Dear Mr Obama --
Please next time you run for president, in four years, use as your slogan, "Trust and Competence".
You suck.
Very truly yours,
J
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