Sunday, April 30, 2006

Top 10 Thomas Jefferson Quotes that He Never Said

10. Would you like fries with that?

9. Bajuss? Wee don' neeno steenkun bajuss.

8. Martha Custis? Did her.

7. Where the hell’s me bloody milk?!?

6. That Napoleon … what a fox! Talk about your boney part! Yum yum!

5. Let’s see. "When in the course of human events..." yeah ... "He has affected to render..." yeah, yeah "...our fortunes and our sacred honor." Right. That’ll do. Here’s the ten pounds, Ben. So we’ll just be saying I wrote it, agreed?

4. There is a wall of separation between Church and State, that the Church must never scale!

3. Bush lied, people died.

2. Idiot! I said get the wig with the pink ribbons! Pink! Not blue! Pink!

1. Up is down.

0. Dissent is the Highest form of Patriotism.



Anonymous said...

That 0; Was that our third president quoting Howard Zinn?

Howard must be thrilled.

Perhaps not, Thomas was such a hateful creature. According to Mr Zinn.

Jack H said...

Well, he was white, wasn't he? That proves he was evil. I should know. I'm very evil.


Anonymous said...

Who did write 0.?

just curious so I can kick the ladder out from under a few buffoons.

Jack H said...

A good discussion is found here:

Upshot is that this version appears to have originated with the president of the ACLU in 1991. Howard Zinn, the leftist historian, did his part to popularize it. The Jefferson Library disavows the quote.

An earlier iteration of the sentiment from the '60s is attributed to Dorothy Hewitt Hutchinson.