Thursday, September 11, 2008

Just Another Day

Last year the Board of Directors here at Forgotten Prophets Amalgamated Corp Inc. Ltd declared September to be National Moslem Terrorist Commemoration Day and Harvest Festival. The response was overwhelming -- so much so that we are still somewhat whelmed. Therefore this year's festivities have been canceled. We have determined that henceforth the holiday formerly known as Nine Eleven will be relegated to the same status as Twelve Seven -- that is, a date that will live in This Day in History lists. Seven years is after all 49 years in dog years, and that seems highly significant, given that Your Humble Author is himself enjoying his year of Jubilee. As I say, highly significant.

Cast back your mind, to seven years ago, the dreaded Summer of the Shark, when all our attention was monopolized by the high drama of the honorable Gary Condit and Shandra Levy, a missing Jewess. Now that was interesting. Not like today's melodrama, where tinpot pols make easily misconstrued references to lipstick and pigs, to the delighted howls of their minions. Oh how we yearn for the heady, weighty days gone by, when hues were brighter and sounds rang their resonance like singing crystal and the air vibrated with an electricity that amounted to the very essence of life! Blahblah blahblah! Yadda yaka waka woo!

Every day is Nine Eleven, and every day is Christmas. Days have the significance we give them. We remember anniversaries not for their emotions but for the resolve they give us -- love her more, make something of my life, retain our firm resolution to extract justice. I used to pretend to think that the universe ended with every human death. The truth is, the life ends for the universe. Something has been removed. It seems energy can be destroyed after all. Another law, broken. I speak of the physical universe, of course -- but that's the only one there is. God and his realm exist elsewhere, for all the occasional intersections.

Point is, as good king Claudius says, nothing is good or bad but thinking makes it so. Humanly speaking. Humanistically speaking. It's not actually true, but it's true the way most of us live our lives. Nine Eleven? It is a day of celebration. They danced on the rooftops, didn't they? Osama looks at his satellite feed and delights in the mournful bagpipes and jauntily fluttering flags marking the deaths of his victims. No doubt wrinkles his brow.

How then are we to know right from wrong? It's very simple. Jesus, a Jew, told us. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. You heard it here. Don't cause outrage to the innocent. Accept punishment when it is deserved. That's what Nine Eleven means. It's a cause and effect thing. We go to the aid of our ally Kuwait to protect the flow of oil. Osama is outraged by infidel troops in his holy land. We launch a two front response. Before all that? Well, we supported the Shah, which led to an Islamic government, which fought a war with Iraq, whose leader needed a distraction in Kuwait. Before that? Well, secret treaties and German socialism and partitioning old Empires. It's very complex, and everyone has legitimate grievances. It's not the grievance that's wrong. It's the atrocities committed because of them.

Humanity is such a stupid idea. I don't know why God came up with it. Something about being admired, I think. Well, who doesn't want to be admired? It only makes sense with God, though. Nobody else deserves it.

Ah well. Just some stray thoughts, on a day like any other.


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