Saturday, August 1, 2009


Let's just take a look at what they want to regulate. HealthCare. Not meds. Not even procedures. Not actually even the providers. All these things are regulated already. It's the care itself. How you get it. How you pay for it. Who from. It's the care they want to regulate, not the health. How can you regulate Care? You can Care about this, but not that? As for regulating Health, that's what bodies are for, in close cooperation with behavior.

Consider food. For all that it's regulated, you can buy it on street corners. It might as well be drugs, for the ease of it. What FoodCare would do is tell you where you can buy it, and when, and what. The more seasoned among us recall the Soviet system, of long outside lines in front of counters blocking empty shelves, or filled with jars of pickled rhubarb. And you had to bring your own bag, like in San Francisco or be fined.

HealthControl has been tried as well. Any socialist system does it. It has the very salubrious effect of providing Care where it will do the most good -- to those who need it least. The aged and infirm are obviously low-priority, being the least productive members of society, and the motto is well known, From each according to his ability, to each according to his need. Since you need only what you can use, and we know what you can use by what you produce, and the sick are least productive, they need the least HealthCare. QED. Socialism is nothing if not logical.

The solution, of course, is SelfcontrolCare. It's this troublesome free will thing. If only the government would live up to its name, and actually govern us, so that we wouldn't have to. Everything else would fall into place. With a sufficiently powerful government, there would be no poverty or illness or crime at all, or Global Warming which is destroying the Planet because of manmade carbon greenhouse gases and stuff, or any other of the endless blights that beset this chaotic world where people actually have the poisonous freedom to follow their own judgment. We know after all how bad it is to be judgmental. Can't we skip all these intermediate steps, and get right to the solution?

We just need to get organized, fer cripe's sake. More government, controlled by a sort of, oh, I don't know, call it a Politburo, comprised of a right-thinking elite who are all loyal to the correct principles. This democracy thing hasn't really been working out, what with the rising of the oceans and the unrest amongst our Islamic fellow humankind. God I hate Bush. If only Gore had won, which he did, then we'd all be driving electric luxury cars and eating soylent arugula in our palazzi situated on placid azure coves. And we'd live to 120, or 200, or in fact why should we ever die at all? It will be Paradise.

So write your Congressperson now, because HealthCare will Save the Planet!


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