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Monday, May 10, 2010

Chains! Hype!

Just thought I'd play that little word game. Git it? Like that Obama thing. Change!!! Hope!!! See? Clever, huh? But I am very clever.

So I was at a massage parlor, getting rubbed all over ... no, I mean I was at the healthfood store, and of course the bumpersticker read: "Hope" with Obama's Che picture, looking soulfully off to our right. His left. See? He appears to present himself to the thoughtless observer as being moderate. But peak behind the veil, and La!

So, chains. A dramatic overstatement of course. There are no actual chains. The reduction of liberty, in favor of the corporate interests of Socialism ... oh, are you confused by the usage of the word "corporate"? You must also then be confused by the general misuse of the term Fascism. Fascism -- a form of Socialism. And to be more precise, instead of "corporate" I should have said "syndicalist". No matter. Point is, Big Government is a relative term. Big compared to what? Sadly, us. Prager is pleased with his new motto, the bigger the government, the smaller the citizen. Yes. And how are we made smaller? We are allowed less, as a little child is not allowed to chose his bedtime.

When government is responsible for healthcare, it has the right to dictate lifestyle choices. Since it incurs the cost of lung cancer, it can limit smoking. Heart disease : diet and exercise. Ad infinitum. It used to be parents who were liable for their teens -- upside of which is that parents could make the rules. Up one metalevel, and it's us as the teens, and Nanny State in charge. (I reserve the term Uncle Sam as a benevolent label.)

As for Hype! -- no duh. When I saw the bumpersticker, I wondered if the owner -- if one can actually own a bumpersticker ... I mean, after all, can we really own anything -- I wondered if she -- I presume the feminine -- felt maybe that the "Hope" was perhaps a trifle outdated? And I asked, who would she blame? Who thwarted his grand promise? Who obstructs the Great New Age Change? Republicans, of course. Americans in general. Stupid, stupid Americans. Greatest force for evil in the herstory of The Planet. Because nothing, nothing could convince me that Obamessiah was not everything the MSM promised him to be. Was it not Prophesied? He's the freaking Twelfth Imam, for Christ sake. Jesus, don't you morons get that? God.

I'm still waiting for that dollar you promised me. My dog doo pickup business isn't doing so well in this economy, but my feet-soaking sideline is carrying me through this rough patch. And my parttime parking lot attendant gig is okay. Still trying to crack the celebrity-spokesmodel-for-something-French market. I want the dollar for some head shots. A portfolio. So?


J

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