Sunday, April 3, 2011

Shit Mohammad

Well, since I'm here, I might as well say. My son ruptured his Achilles tendon today, testing for the Games. Needs surgery. He's very stoical about it, as is our way, but it is what it is -- bad news. So I have a father's grim concern about the matter.

The Religion of Stupidity is demonstrating its character again. Three beheadings so far in Crapistan, innocents ripped out of a UN building -- a female helicopter pilot, and a Swede, I seem to remember. You know, cuz a Floridian burned a koran. It's being denounced all over as intolerant and hateful ... I mean the koran burning, not the beheadings. That's a sacrament.

It's too obvious to rehash. You know, how stupid moslems are. Probably stupider than the global average, as a group. That would be because it's a Third World religion, where backwardness is to the front. We're all stupid. It's just that sometimes there are cultural expectations of civilized behavior. Mostly, not, though, in Crapistan and points south.

So I'm going to engage in a bit of performance art. I'll roll up a koran (small-print version thank you very much) and insert it into my anus, vigorously and repeatedly, simulating sodomy. The Left won't know what to think. Sodomy is good, as is performance art and public displays of freedom and vulgarity -- the Libs will fight to the death to defend my right in this -- but then again, koran-sodomy is intolerant and hateful.

Will somebody please do a google search for all the Lefties who denounced the artistic masterpiece Piss Christ?

As for Libya, I don't know what to think. Seems the "rebels" ... insurgents? freedom fighters? terrorists? ... are coalescing around a leadership of Taliban. Well of course. Nobody else is stepping up to lead them. So that's turning to crap istan. Obama's War. How ironic, that he should be a Cowboy. Well, a Dude. It's okay though, cuz he doesn't approve of his war. See? Like me with a koran up my butt. I don't approve of it. It just feels necessary. More harm than good will come of it, but it would promote my own self interest not to, and that would be like capitalism, bad. Oh, it's nuanced.

So, to tie it all together, let us present

The Obama Doctrine:

The United States shall be bound by no consideration of precedent or consistency. Contingencies of the moment shall dictate policy.

The United States shall involve itself only in conflicts that have no direct bearing on American national interest. Deference shall be given to governments that are hostile to American interests; no action suggesting an effort to promote American interests shall be initiated, supported or sustained.

There is no "America exceptionalism", no uniquely positive role in world history or current events. At most, The United States bears a special guilt for its wastefulness and arrogance; at worst, it is The Planet's preeminent force for injustice, intolerance, oppression, eco-genocide, homophobia, and middlebrow art.

And for the sake of completeness and symmetry,

The Biden Corollary:


Oh, nothing to contribute? Maybe later, when he's done talking. Meanwhile, here's a joke. Three moslems go into a bar, and behead everyone ... or maybe they blow up themselves and everyone else too. I'm honing it. It's the details that will make it funny.


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